Stop “Should-ing”

One month into my shoulder surgery recovery, my daughter told me to stop “should-ing” on myself. Somehow this new slang snuck into the vernacular of generation X. The phrase is clearly a play on a common cuss but I looked deeper and noticed the word “should” and the world “shoulder” are not far apart.

Could it be that when I tell myself I “should” do something, I pile it on my shoulder? Was my shoulder injury a message that I piled on too much?

One thing I know is certain; the values of the next generation speak loudly to drawing boundaries and taking good care of themselves. A lesson I clearly need to learn.

The holidays are supposed to be a time of celebration. But Christmastime seems to be the season of “shoulds” for me.

Here is a sample of my “should list” for December:

I should accept every party invitation, even if there are 3 on the same night
I should bake home made Christmas cookies
I should decorate the house with every ornament I own
I should wrap all the gifts single handed
I should invite so and so to dinner…

Maybe it’s time to trim my “should list” along with the tree. Which activities help me rejoice? Which feel more like responsibilities? Will I be bustling about or bearing a burden? Am I having fun or becoming forlorn?

Applying honesty and discernment, I can draw the distinction between mere obligation and that which supports me. Perhaps these questions will lead me to the truth of myself, the nature of my being.

This Christmas, I vow to stop the “should-ing”. My shoulder will heal and my heart will sing during these days of good cheer.

Isn’t that the way Christmas was meant to be?

Savor the moment….

Debra Mae